‘Sam Chithapa’ my nephew repeated the word for the umpteenth time. He was showing me around his university campus. I was following him, catching my breath often, trying to be his cool uncle, walking around his fancy university, and talking about stuff that I thought he would like. Oh, yes! The nephew is already 20. I feel old.
What does it mean to be 20? oh, what a joyful time 20 is! My mind took me down memory lane.
I had joined college. Engineering college, which I hated with all my heart. I could have so easily been a doctor I suppose, but God had different plans. Anyways, looking back, life ain’t that bad then! How can life at 20 be bad? I mean, responsibilities are minimal and so life had to be fun right? Less responsibility, less worry.
I was very sure of myself then! So cocky sure. I knew the world was not run well. If only they had given me the chance to run it; Everywhere I go, I had a view of the world around me and its people. The college principal didn’t know a thing. The Head of the department, he is a moron. My mom was too naive, dad too erratic, Christianity is dying, or waiting for me to save it, Manmohan Singh the then prime minister doesn’t have a clue about running a country, and well the world was in fact waiting for my wisdom. I judged everyone and had an opinion on everything. Have I changed now? With all the grey hairs, I hope I'm no longer that anymore. The wifey will know better.
As much as I thought knew the world, my tentacles often looked interested in newer things, perhaps looking for newer problems to solve. I remember the first time the caste system and reservation were discussed, it felt like the third eye was opened. I first read about LED lights and went awwww. When Steve Jobs announced the iPhone, oh what joy and thrill to read about it. It was joy undiminished to know the best friend is flying abroad and to learn newer things about that elusive ‘abroad'. I wish I get back that inquisitiveness. The joy of learning newer things. The tired and sad me now often gasps at newer things. How I wish I’m 20 again
The world out there always sounded green and blue. London and New York and Perth and Canberra were distant dreams, waiting only to be conquered. The serene, green IT industry was beckoning me. Very soon I will have lots of money, a beautiful house, fancy cars, and a dream job. I will be writing programs o save the world from disaster. There will not be any hunger and poverty. The naivety of the young adult world. I can die to go back to that world of colors, rather than the somber, complaining, sad, and poverty-ridden world mine is now.
There were days during college when the then best friend and I could pull off an all-nighter (Talked through the night), go to a full day of college, play a game in the evening, and still have energy for the next day. Now, the backache is a reality. One night of sleepless travel and the next morning life makes sure you remember the bed. If only I can go back to that body of my youth!
Does one fear anything at 20? I remember the time when I decided to climb down a mountain with a rope tied to the waist and a huge waterfall falling over. Phew, just thinking of that makes me faint now. Yesterday a friend helped me do something far less scary and oh, the nervousness of it all.
If allowed to go back in life, I will go back to my 20 and live it all over again! Perhaps in a different college :) But in the same daring, cocky sure, dreamy, optimistic, and busy individual I was then.
I look at my nephew now and wish he can remain the same! But can someone defeat father time?
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