Monday, June 17, 2019

Attributing a character to the group!

Nadars are business-minded people! Brahmins, ah, we know what they are. Christians are looking at an opportunity to convert. Muslims want to dominate. The girls from Nagercoil are calculative. Well, black people are rough and English are racist. Americans only think about money, Tamils are conservative and of course yes, Malayalees are a closed group.

I will be honest! Some of these were my ideas too; We have all used them at various points of our lives. We attribute a character to a group!

And that groupings were of varied different forms! Religion, race, country, city, language, and even gender.

Yes, that is the norm. Everyone does it.  Surely most people of a group, when a character is attributed to that group, display that character, and what is wrong with that? I can hear you all come back at me! Let me tell this story.

Today morning at work a terrifying incident happened. When my boss and I were on the way to work one random guy came and threatened us. He started abusing! Expletives, you name it, he used it. We were taken aback. We did not know how to react. After a full five minute of abuse, he decided to walk away.

All four of us in that place, me, my boss, another colleague and that man are from different countries and are from different races. Basically, we had different skin colours. After the incident, the immediate reaction in your brain is to identify that race to that kind of behaviour. Well, it is natural! Ain't it?

He was abusive coz, he was thinking he is retaliating against a wrong done to his race by other races present there. No, he had it wrong! Not everyone from the race which had targeted him have the same ideology. My mind started thinking badly about that race until I had to remind myself about a few wonderful friends I have from that same race!

You get the drift right?

Individuals vary! They vary within a group. Their characters change over a period of time. Of course, every individual has some influences from the group(community/clan or whatever) they mingle with often. But that does not make them another human being! They may have similar ideologies. They may have similar views on certain issues. They may behave in a certain way. But nothing can make one man a carbon copy of another man.

Thus when we judge an individual and attribute a character to an individual, it is imperative we think twice! Coz, judgment should always be on an individual and never the group!

I told myself today, that come what may, I will never relate hatred to the race of the man who abused me! For it was that individual who wronged me and not the race. 

Saturday, June 8, 2019

Love shall prevail!

"Why do I hate the Pakistani cricket team?", I asked myself. As a self-proclaimed cricket aficionado, logic says I should love the Pakistani cricketers since Pakistan always had the biggest cricketing talent. Always! Who would not have gone 'wow' when Wasim Akram bowled those toe crushers or when Saeed Anwar hit those gorgeous cover drives? Yet, growing up every time when Pakistani cricket did miracles, an in-built hatred brewed up. A sort of jealousy I presume!

Why were we made to look at Pakistan as an enemy growing up? What made us believe that all Pakistanis think about is to dislodge peace in my country? Who told me that all Pakistanis are bad people? How was I made to understand that Pakistan broke into a separate country coz they hated me?

Ah, history had been cruel to us!

Till the moment we (Me and my friend) invited some Pakistanis home for dinner I never realized what a beautiful group of people they were! And when they invited us for the eid celebration, I realized we have all along been tricked into believing some wrong notion about a country, and because of that a group of people!

Oh, what a time I had on Eid! It has been a long time since somebody had invited me to all the three meals of the day. Am I that cruel? Well, they did! We played pranks, laughed out loud, pulled each other's legs, had a lot of fun. Yet, it was not just frivolous fun. There was love! Palpable love. You could sense it in the air.

Just a group of Pakistanis and Indians. Wishing the best for each other. We did discuss the sport. We argued about politics, the dirty game. We, of course, had different opinions. But, through it all, the love never went away.

As I bade farewell that night, 'K' hugged me saying 'Thanks Sam bhai'; And in that moment of brotherhood, we broke the chains of hatred which had bound us.

Politics and politicians may divide us. History may divide us. Geography may divide us. Vote bank politics and unruly mobs may divide us. Religion may divide us. Yet, that day proved to me that the only emotion that will prevail is love.

Here is to many more years of loving friendship and brotherhood(Sisterhood) to the wonderful people from Pakistan who helped me open my eyes to love beyond an inbuilt hatred. For love shall prevail!













Sunday, June 2, 2019

The impulsive road trip!

As I opened my Chrome browser late in the night yesterday this quote popped up! 

“Don't think about what might go wrong, think about what could be right.”

I smiled at it. Providence! 

Well, let me tell you the story behind it. So last Friday I submitted all my written work. Nearly 15000 words of writing in 15 days. I won't really say I had slogged it out, but surely worked hard for it. Friday night I met a friend at an Iftar party, and over biriyani, we discussed a road trip that we should do. Since it became late that night, we just slept over the idea. Literally slept over it! Next day morning things fell in place. We decided we will rent a car and do a random trip. A trip to nowhere in particular. 

And what two days! If you have not tried driving through the villages and towns of the UK on an English summer, you should. Beauty redefined! Well, beauty defined. 

And just before starting we wanted to include one more person. But nobody turned up. Everyone was sleeping after the tiring month I suppose. Few were drunk. And one even said, I can't take an impulsive decision like that. 

Well, that is the story of an impulsive decision to drive randomly for two days. 500 miles. Four friends! English summer! Greenery! A brilliant DJ with indie pop and Punjabi folk and razzmatazz Bollywood numbers!  And well, a whole lot of intense conversation. 

What if I had thought about things going wrong before deciding to drive! Thankfully I didn't. Everything went right. And I will let you decide why it is the right decision by looking at some of these photos. 



You got to admire the photographer! I meant GOD!



My driver. He used to be an IAS officer! Wink! Wink

                                                   

                                                   
                                                                Looking beyond!



                                                             No, we did not climb this cliff!


                                                   
                                         
                                The only word in the english language I know to describe this is 'wow'!



                                            The partners in crime! If impulsiveness is one.



                                       My wife thinks I'm colour blind. Clearly, I'm not. No?




                                                    Did I tell you it was green? All over!



                                                      Arundel fort from a distance!




Fancy Cars






                               This was what we saw on either side of the road. Serene and green!




                                                                     The drive!