Aren't relationships complex? And i mean all kinds of relationships.
I have been thinking about this for quite some time now. Ever since a good friend was found struggling in life just because a relationship with a friend became sour. X was questioning herself, felt frustrated. Even felt inferior and went in to a shell.
Suddenly I realised X is doubting her self worth when that relationship soured. She had just come out of a bigger depression and had became a little more emotionally attached to this person. And in the process was actually throttling the other person as well. And she fell deeper in that well called depression.
Why do relationships sometime bring in so much pain? Wasn't relationships supposedly beautiful? I always thought a man cannot live alone. The human being in him starts growing as soon as he starts relating to people around him. And the dependent beings we are, it makes sense only if a relationship makes people happier and in the process better human beings. Of course the best times of my life are the times spent laughing with friends and family.
But does it always happen? More often than not, relationships hurt. The best of friends fight! Meeting relatives sometimes becomes a chore. You don't even want to meet the best friend from college. Why does it happen that way? Often enough we don't want to answer that phone call from the friend with whom you had spent eons with!
Why? Why? Why? How I wish the answers are as easy as the questions.
I don't have an answer as usual. But just three thoughts which made me write this.
1) May be man needs a space which should not be touched. And if that space is given, most of the relationships are bliss. May be it sours because we often trample that space.
2) May be in a relationship we expect people to respond to us the way we wanted the person to respond or the way we usually respond forgetting that people are born and made differently.
3) Also, we often forget the other human being has a life other than the small circle which was the relationship. He has a whole world other than you to live. And may be that is more important to that person than the relationship itself.
The solutions are complex of course. If they are simple the world would have been a better place. But give it a try.
Whoops! I have become a relationship consultant!
I have been thinking about this for quite some time now. Ever since a good friend was found struggling in life just because a relationship with a friend became sour. X was questioning herself, felt frustrated. Even felt inferior and went in to a shell.
Suddenly I realised X is doubting her self worth when that relationship soured. She had just come out of a bigger depression and had became a little more emotionally attached to this person. And in the process was actually throttling the other person as well. And she fell deeper in that well called depression.
Why do relationships sometime bring in so much pain? Wasn't relationships supposedly beautiful? I always thought a man cannot live alone. The human being in him starts growing as soon as he starts relating to people around him. And the dependent beings we are, it makes sense only if a relationship makes people happier and in the process better human beings. Of course the best times of my life are the times spent laughing with friends and family.
But does it always happen? More often than not, relationships hurt. The best of friends fight! Meeting relatives sometimes becomes a chore. You don't even want to meet the best friend from college. Why does it happen that way? Often enough we don't want to answer that phone call from the friend with whom you had spent eons with!
Why? Why? Why? How I wish the answers are as easy as the questions.
I don't have an answer as usual. But just three thoughts which made me write this.
1) May be man needs a space which should not be touched. And if that space is given, most of the relationships are bliss. May be it sours because we often trample that space.
2) May be in a relationship we expect people to respond to us the way we wanted the person to respond or the way we usually respond forgetting that people are born and made differently.
3) Also, we often forget the other human being has a life other than the small circle which was the relationship. He has a whole world other than you to live. And may be that is more important to that person than the relationship itself.
The solutions are complex of course. If they are simple the world would have been a better place. But give it a try.
Whoops! I have become a relationship consultant!
